26-08-2018 11:22 PM
Wow appletree - That's an amazingly diplomatic suggestion. Very subtle approach, without any threat. you're not a psychologist by any chance are you?? I'd have never thought of that.
Alibobs - I hope it all goes well for you darlin girl. Are you a legal exec or something like that? Am only asking, as to how easy a person you may be, to gain employment elsewhere, should you need to, in the worst case scenario. If it doesn't work, I'll get Appletree to join me in sorting them out for you,by other methods, hey?!
Good luck. Am keen to hear how you go on
Lots of love to everyone
26-08-2018 02:15 PM
26-08-2018 10:10 AM - edited 26-08-2018 10:12 AM
Oh dear Alibobs, what a nasty situation to be in. I agree with Delly that your Asian colleagues sound very rude and rather racist. I do empathize and would find returning to work very daunting.
Is there some way in which you can turn things round to work to your advantage? It's horribly easy to allow other people to trample us into a corner, especially if we're feeling fragile after illness, so I'm wondering how you can take your boss and these particular colleagues by surprise, whilst giving yourself some control over the situation and building your own confidence.
I might be completely up the creak with my suggestions, in which case please excuse me, but here are a few thoughts.
Can you prompt some conversation with your Asian Colleagues? Is there anything you can ask their advice on, such as something to do with Asian food you'd like to try? What type of Asian dress do they wear? Is it the very subdued type of Muslim garments, or are they wearing colourful scarves you could admire?
I'm also wondering whether you might ask them to update you on what has been happening in the workplace whilst you've been on sick leave. People often do like being asked for advice. If other colleagues have been shunning them, perhaps they feel rather left out, so are clinging to each other and their own culture in defence. They might rise to the occasion if you can give them a lead on working together in some way. (On the other hand, I might be completely misjudging the situation.)
It sounds as though other non-Asian colleagues haven't made much effort with/got very far with this little clique, so if you can find a way of bringing them out a bit and prompting some English conversation, you could be earning brownie points and defying any attempt on your Boss's part to put you at a disadvantage.
Good luck with your return to work.
26-08-2018 08:48 AM
26-08-2018 06:50 AM
24-08-2018 12:42 PM
18-08-2018 03:50 PM
It makes me so sad to read these posts of insensitivite conduct of company HR idiots!!
I have to say it is the same now in Education; I retired from teaching as soon as could as the new ‘breed’ of head teacher is only concerned about school performance and not the staff or indeed the pupils!!! Thankfully I didn’t have to cope with bc whilst still working.
I hope you lovely ladies ignore all that rubbish and take time to care for yourselves...and enjoy the holidays too.
People don’t realise that you only see 10% of a person at face value...who knows what the other 90% is sufferering.
Best wishes to everyone and hope you’re feeling ok today.
love Rosie xx
18-08-2018 01:42 PM
18-08-2018 12:36 PM
Oh geez, those HR staff deserve to hauled over the coals for that sort of treatment of staff!! They are legally obliged to help staff return to work in appropriate fashion and should know how to talk to people. It's so disappointing that they are failing people in this way.
I think I'm lucky that I'm taking a break from work for the time being so I don't have the pressure of returning to work before I'm ready, although I am missing the social aspect of work at the moment especially as my colleagues in my last place were so supportive and understanding.
17-08-2018 07:40 PM - edited 17-08-2018 07:41 PM
That’s dreadful !! Does she have a sister - sounds like our own beloved HR person ! 😄
You go on that holiday and enjoy yourself, s@d them...you are so entitled to put yourself first here, ( I had a similar carry on, we went after my surgery on 4th July, I kept getting almost daily calls from Occ Health but ignored it.. we so needed that holiday.)
Have a great time!
17-08-2018 07:25 PM
17-08-2018 07:01 PM
I have just heard of a cracker of an inappropriate comment, a young friend of mine got diagnosed with BC a few months before I did. It was triple negative Grade 3, and she has been through the mill of mental agony, and chemo and rads...
(Our place of employment does not hold any medals for staff welfare, her line manager visited her whilst she was waiting for her chair in the Chemo Day Unit to ask when she thought she’d be back at work ?)
She went back after much nagging, far too soon, whilst still undergoing radiotherapy, and the planned phased return turned in to full time after exactly one week..so she went to her GP and got another sick note, until her treatment ended and she was recovered from the effects.
Apparently the supposed ‘HR manager’ - although we don’t really have one as our HR was contracted out ages ago (this is the Civil Service btw), rang her at home to ask ‘what was the reason for her being off sick now?’
Friend - ‘Has the doc not written it on the sick note?’
Woodentop (aka HR) - ‘Yes, but it says Breast Cancer - you can’t still have that surely...’
Words absolutely failed me - dreading my own return...if I encounter The Enlightened One and get something similar, I’ll be no doubt summarily sacked, - if I can refrain from actual ABH !! 😖😄
16-08-2018 08:08 AM
I usually respond to the ‘You're looking very well’ comment by ‘I’m being very well looked after.’ That covers it!!
Both the treatment and care from the medical team and my lovely husband. Then I don’t have to explain anything more.
Maggie48 - your husband sounds really wonderful!! That’s what you need by your side.
Hope everyone is doing well today.