Diagnosed last week

[nursingdiagnosis]

The person who is heading to depression phase different kind of mindset, where there are mood swings, and thoroughly be in a moody and an empty kind of mentality. The person mostly remains sad, anxious and most of the time, the person spends lonely. best nursing diagnosis

[Mai7]

Hi Lillyspy,  sorry you find yourself here.  Do have a chat if there are any concerns we can help you with.  Here's my story which may be of some comfort and it takes you through a virtual journey with lots of suggestions and useful info. lifeafterlola.com xx

[Jojoswift]

Thank you so much everyone, it really helps to hear from women in the same situation. Feeling ok today, who knows what tomorrow will bring?
I'm not going for a reconstruction straight away, I want to see how I feel with my scar first.
Janie, i checked out Knitted knockers and have requested one, they sound great!!
Nettle, I hope you get your date soon, the waiting really is the worst isn't it? I'm also going to ask all my friends who want to help but don't know how, to suggest their favourite books / films so I have a good supply of feel good stuff to do list op (as I'll go mad if I watch daytime tv for long!). Grabbing a weekend away with my partner too, we both need a bit of time to relax before the op I think.
Mai, will follow your blog and yes, I need to think about reconstruction and what it means to me to lose a breast...I'm going to give myself plenty of time before making any decisions.
Sending you all best wishes for your journey xxx

[Mai7]

Hi jojoswift, Sorry you find yourself here in the club none of us wanted to join.  It's understandable that you don't know where to start.  The news of breast cancer is quite a bombshell to get your head around so all emotions are completely normal.  You just have to work through them all; denial, detachment, meltdowns.....  I had a mastectomy last November and I'm awaiting reconstruction.  Having a mastectomy is a really horrible  feeling.  I felt completely traumatised.  It feels like a big kick in your feminity but having cancer is worse and that is the thing which has to go.  Everyone copes differently and the decision whether to have recon or not depends on how you feel.  It makes you question "what makes you identify as being a woman?" and everyone feels different about this.  There is no right or wrong answer but there is 'what is right for you?'.  You just have to give yourself time to heal mentally as well as physically.  Here's my blog which has my story as well of lots of suggestions which you may find helpful:  lifeafterlola.com

Sending hugs   xx

[Janie123]

Hi

I had a mastectomy on 31st October. I am not sure if you are having a reconstruction ( immediate or delayed) or no reconstruction. I couldn't have immediate reconstruction as I needed radiotherapy ( which I am nearly finished). I was completely traumatised at the thought of losing my breast. I posted on this forum, and lots of the lovely ladies gave me advice. Firstly, if you are going to have a reconstruction, remember it's temporary. Get on to the ' knitted knockers' website. They are a charity and if you email with your cupsize they will send you , completely free, these fabulous knitted prostheses- one everyday one and an ' aqua knocker' for swimming. They even have a knitted nipple, so , with clothes on, no-one can tell.The silicone prosthesis that is provided six weeks post-op is even better, and is fitted to match the other breast. It really is incredible.

Initially, after the mastectomy, I thought I would never be able to look at the scar. However, when I went to remove the dressing, I braced myself to look, and it actually wasn't as bad as I feared. It's worse anticipating the loss, but somehow, when it's gone, it;'s gone, and you can have it reconstructed should you wish.

Also, I reminded myself that it was the removal of a diseased part of my body, and this was going to save my life. This helped in coming to terms with it.

Having said all this, I completely empathise with your feelings now, and will be thinking of you

Best wishes

Jane x

[Nettie62]

Hi Jojo
I am coping in concentrating on the here and now. I found out on 12/12 that I will need a mastectomy and have as yet not even a date for the operation, Bizarrely everything else around me just seems to carry on as usual whilst my head is all over the place!?
I looked up on how to prepare for a mastectomy so am taken the advice of treating myself before D-Day.
Hubby and I had a lovely weekend break last weekend in a hotel with swimmingpol and sauna as I won’t be putting my bikini on for a bit, I am having a body massage next week (I believe lying in your tummy may take a while).
Before I go for the procedure I intend to have my hair done. I am sure I can find a few other things for treats until then and that keeps me busy. I usually feel guilty spending money on myself but it’s my turn now, I even treated myself to a dress for Xmas which I got complimented on, I am usually a jeans and jersey kind of woman.
No one can take away our fears and worries, and everyone deals with it differently! I get that sinking feeling from time to time but then try to find something positive I can concentrate on! A heartfelt hug works wonders, a message or txt out of the blue showing me a friend or relative is thinking of me may leave me crying but then I do feel better afterwards, I am also making plans for after the op, there are books to read and movies to watch, nothing stopping me now. I don’t know as yet how I may feel when I realise my breast is gone, I’ll deal with it when that realisation hits me and hopefully my family and friends will then be there for me.
I send you big hugs, and wish you good luck, xx

[ann-m]

Hi Jojo,

First of all, welcome & glad you found us.

The feelings you describe are quite usual as getting a diagnosis is such a shock, but the important thing now is, that it will be dealt with.

It is a rollercoaster & your feelings will be all over the place in coming to terms with it all, at this stage.

This stage does pass however & it does settle down when the treatment plan is finalised.

Do look at the 'going through treatment' parrt of the forum & do join your monthly chemo thread where you will be able to chat & get support from others where you are now, as well as further down the line.

I didn't have a mastectomy, but the other ladies will be along shortly to share their experiences.

Do come & chat or vent whenever you need to.

ann x

[Jojoswift]

Hello everyone
My first post and not sure where to start!
I was diagnosed last week, after biopsy of a lump I found. I am scheduled for mastectomy on 21st, then chemo. Initially was offered a lumpectomy but due to a genetic condition I can't have radiotherapy.
I'm trying my best to stay positive, but frequently finding myself either really weepy or terrified.
Would love some advice as to how you came to terms with losing a breast and also how you dealt with the fear.
Thank you so much.
Xxx