Busy thread as always. Some uplifting news some not so great.
Sonia28 I am so pleased your scan results were good.
The finishing line is happening to so many of you now well done Seaside Sa, Edinbird and Deano. You are all fantastic, and yes I am really envious of you all being able to complete your course.
Marlyn hope your skin improves.
Suzie B not long to wait now for surgery I am sure you will find it ok after dealing with chemo.
Daisydi I agree that this BC lark will never be over, how can it be. I read the article by Dr Peter Harvey After Treatment finishes -then what again last night in bed. He avoids phrases like 'coming to terms with' instead talks about living with uncertainty. He also suggests that when treatment cones to an end is when our fears at at their worst. I know that when I first started on my treatment plan I needed all my mental strength to cope with the physical assaults of two surgeries in three weeks. Then chemo 1 and then the dreaded sepsis. All of these stresses almost helped me live in the moment as each one was hard to get through as you all know. Now I have less physical issues to deal with my mind can work like a little b***er. I agree Daisydi and Marlyn we will never be the same women again but again to quote Peter Harvey we need to regain mastery and control which he sees as the alternative to getting back to normal. I am trying to work on that one 🤔.
To end on a positive note I love the Garden photos Rosina so beautiful. Also the video was epic.
Implausible I am sure you will find Letrozole a breeze after all you have dealt with, and your boy looks fantastic.
Have a good evening everyone.xxxxxxx Husband just asked usual question HOW LONG WILL TEA BE???
Deano so pleased for you. Yes Monday will be my last one. Im getting emotional just thinking about it. x
I’m with you honey all the way you are not alone personally just get it over with I didn’t fully recover to be honest for this one either- will it be your last one? if so do it and you’ll soon be able to recover ❤️❤️❤️
sorry ladies it won’t let me post my video of my bell ringing but it was emotional and worth it xx
Aar thanks Nettie. I will be ok just having a moment! I would like to ask for a delay but I also want it all over and done with. Im just not good at being sick and because my first surgery was in October this has all been going on far too long for me with one battle after another. Just had another look at my eyelashes and I think its new ones growing through and because Im not putting any mascara on they are growing downwards. Ive bought some clear mascara so will try to train them with that. Might have a go with the teabags though x
PS Lovely photo Seaside Sar. You look great! x
Daisy, you have every right to feel miserable you poor thing. So much discomfort to put up with of course you will be feeling down and anxious. I have used cold tea bags on my eyes before now. Very soothing but don’t be alarmed if your eye area looks stained when you take them off, it does wash off.
You may feel more ready by Monday but if not perhaps asking for a delay might be a good thing. As far as the anxiety, don’t be afraid to ask for help if you aren’t on any medication. Fluoxetine has helped me no end. I intend to get off them as soon as Chemo is over but I know I would not have managed this without medication. I have stayed on the lowest dosage even when encouraged to go a bit higher by gp but I think if I only take the minimum to get me through, the side effects when stopping them should be minimal.
Deano, Big hugs for you and yes let those tears flow. Xxxx
Marlyn, totally get what you mean when people say, you're nearly done/all done now. Far from it! Herceptin, Rads, tabs...not to mention impact on mental health and recovery needed. Feel like such a moaner saying this to family and friends but I know you ladies are on my wavelength. Thank goodness for you lot xxxx
Sarah, your son has done amazingly well to lose all that weight. Looking very trendy in the photo. 😊
Thank you all you lovely ladies for your kind messages. It really helps.
It hasn't sunk in yet that I have no more chemo left. Maybe when I've got through these next few weeks it will feel more real.
Alarm has just gone off to remind me to take injections out of the fridge...reality check.
Deano, hope you're all done by now and back home. Well done for getting past this part and I hope the SEs are bearable over the next couple of weeks. Xx
Daisy, I'm sorry you're struggling at the moment lovely. We're here for you, don't forget. Xx
Sonia, I'm so relieved to hear the shadow on your lung turned out to be clear. Phew! Was so worried for you. Xx
For Daisydi, Sonia28, Deano, Nettinoo, Seasidesar, Edinbird, SusieB, Ocean21, Veronica, , Implausible, MBJ, Stargazer , Trixielady and myself ( apologies if I have forgotten anyone- not intentionally)
She has a great voice.
Well done Deano for your last one. I hope the side effects aren't too bad for you. I am absolutely dreading mine on Monday knowing what joys it brings. I have been for bloods today and am secretly hoping it needs delaying as I still havent got over the last one yet.
Sonia so glad your scans were clear. That's another worry over for you.
I am feeling totally miserable knowing what the next couple of weeks will bring but I will just have to get on with it I suppose. I just hope this chemo does its job. When I asked my onco how we knew it had worked he said we dont but just hope it has. I dont think I could go through this again but having 4 positive lymph nodes and the prospect of radiotherapy to my neck I am now worrying for England! Dont know how to get over this fear and know I have to be positive but am finding it very hard, especially when people say its nearly over. It will never be over for me. My eyes are constantly watering as what lashes I have got left seem to be growing downwards right into my eyes and my eyelids are swollen. My toes and feet really hurt as do my finger nails. Sorry for the miserable post but it is really getting to me at the moment.
Despite all that we're going through we can still manage a bit of humour 😄. Think my husband might balk at a bit if I asked my onc for seduction. I blame spelling errors on predictive text.. It did make me laugh. xx
Deano, I asked my onco for a T reduction and he said no, maybe if I had asked for seduction I might have got somewhere!!!
(Actually, looking at the state of me today, probably not )
Sonia great news about the scan results. Over the moon for you.
And Nettie, I agree, I think the totally carefree old me has been and gone. But I'm hoping I can at least get my hair and some energy back eventually!
I think you are right about the sheer accumulation of chemo. I have been blaming T for making me feel so awful but 6 FEC might well have been just as bad. It definitely builds up.
Deano....seduction.....lol.....that made me titter......I did wonder what doctor prescribed that....xxxx
Thanks for the update Sonia, you know how we worry about one another....gosh we're an expensive lot! Xxxx
Just sat and have about 40 mins left thank god im sat trying not to cry and will spill at the end - I’m sure you will be fine on T but remember if not have s eduction as this has helped me
thanks to everyone for your kind words and I’ll try and post my bell ringing xx
thought i’d Update you all quickly before my next scan.
So I’ve had £1000 worth of tests
2 ct scans ultra sound on leg, echo on heart and chest X-ray to find out it all clear, just chemo related. Shadow on lung cane up as nothing on the big Ct scan so all good 🤗
just waiting to go for my radiotherapy ct scan now, will catch up with you all
later 💕💕💕love you all
Final chemo session☺. Well done but as you say, it can be very emotional. After my 4th and final one I felt rather deflated but I've still got the joy of at least two more after surgery☹. My fault for volunteering for a trial. At least you haven't got too long to wait for surgery. Mine was supposed to have been 5 to 6 weeks after chemo but I was in such a state when I saw the surgeon and had pre op checks I think she thought it best to wait a while. My heart was racing so much I had an ECG and my blood pressure was high to say the least. I've been on meds for anxiety during the past 3 weeks or so and things are a lot better and I feel a bit more relaxed about next week. It's will have been a 9 week wait between chemo and surgery. I'm the same as you and having lumpectomy and full node clearance. Have that cry if you want😭😭😭. Better out than in. Take care and ring that bell just as loud as you want🔔🔔🔔🔔🔔 xxxxxx
oh yes, 4 cycles of fec left me feeling completely grotty.....there are no other words....I think The fluttery heart had me worried the most...still get the palpitations now....fleetingly.....oh...and the yellow eyeballs...I keep asking if my liver is ok...and the oncologist seems happy.....I just wish the yellow would go...
all ok at rads today, they gave me gel and dressings......got 9 sessions left, they said the tiredness will kick in about 2 weeks post rads......I said ....are you kidding?? I'm still fatigued from chemo.....god help me after rads then!
Its funny you say about feeling faint at bloods.....I was the same on wed....the nurse couldn't get anything out of one arm so stabbed around my right arm saying " sharp scratch " bloody sharp scratch my bum!! I thought I was going to flake out and normally I'm pretty good ....
im actually enjoying the rain at the mo but only because I don't have to go anywhere......I love listening to it...all cosy indoors watching " years and years" xxx
Implausible, what you said about people wanting their old friend back really struck a chord with me. My husband keeps saying things like “I can’t wait to get my old wife back” and “it won’t be long before you are back to your normal self”. I don’t have the heart to say that the “old me” is probably gone forever. I hope the “new me”will still be acceptable to my family and friends but I reckon it’s pretty impossible for all this barryness to not have changed me and I’m not talking about the scars, wonky boob, loss of nipple etc but something much more profound. I know you will all feel the same.
Deano, I wish we could all come and help you launch that bell out of the window. 😘
I had my blood test nice and early and now it’s the wait for the call or no call! I’m still not feeling great. Temp fine, blood pressure fine, tum fine just feel a bit grot and under the weather, no energy so no benefit to having an extra week this time. I’m wondering if it’s just the effect of 4 X FEC accumulating inside me, in which case I’m not looking forward to what no. 5 will do. Marlyn, was this how you felt after 4 FEC? This barrier gel, why isn’t it just prescribed for everyone as a matter of course? cost I suppose. It’s obviously not provided until the damage has been done.
It took a couple of goes to get my blood this morning and I came over a bit faint which is not like me at all. Then took my temp when I got home and it was 35.3 so ended up piling layers on and a woolly hat and thick socks to bring it up again. I’m downing plenty of water Imp/Sarah to see if that makes a difference.
Persistent rain isn’t helping either. Trying to get the dogs out for a wee is a nightmare for a start.
Edinbird and Implausible hope those awful aches b*gger off asap.
Love you all. Xxx
Morning you lovely strong lot
And that includes those of you who probably don't feel too strong right now but you are anyway, so ner.
Deano best of luck today!!! Another one of us across the finishing line, hooray! Well, almost, as you point out, you still have the side effects of the last dose to get through. Mine are kicking in today, fun fun fun. But somehow knowing what to expect and that it is the last time I have to feel like this, does make it easier. A bit.
Look forward to seeing your bell video if you can find a way to share it with us, otherwise we will just have to use our imaginations
Nettie.... you did make me blush a little but I don't think it is entirely deserved. I certainly don't feel like an amazing mum. I tried my best to help him for years but it wasn't until he actually started to want to help himself that we started making progress. At least I was there to support him at that point I guess. But how I wish I could have prevented him getting to such a low point in the first place
Stuff that is coming out in his counselling sessions goes a long way to explain things though. There was stuff going on I could never have figured out.
Anyway, all is heading in a great direction now and he is a whole different person in every respect.
Good luck with bloods today and drink lots of water to keep those headaches at bay x
Edinbird, thanks for the update. I had to Google WLE as I haven't come across that one before. So many acronyms! Seems it is another term for lumpectomy. Your lump is way smaller than mine was (33mm) and if it has flattened then it may still be similar width/diameter across as before but volume wise it will be smaller. Like squashing a bubble. So I'm sure they can whip it out with ease!
The best news is that your lymph nodes have cleared up as they are the scary bit. Anything contained within the breast can be dealt with but we don't want any nasties escaping through the lymphatic system....
I'm still a bit concerned about my lymph nodes. They took 2 out when they did my sentinel node biopsy and one had "small traces" of cancer. They haven't recommended a node clearance, reckoning that chemo and rads will do the job. But I've not been offered any scans so I have no idea how I will be sure it has "worked". Just have to trust the docs I guess?
And good luck with the boiler. My house is the same. Always something on the blink! I still haven't managed to get our central heating thermostat working properly since it had its paddy 3 weeks ago and turned the house into a sauna. Now I'm just turning the central heating off at the boiler and switching it on manually for an hour if we hit a cold spell. It will probably save me money that way as it won't come on by itself when we don't really need it..... but I guess I ought to get it fixed before next winter....
Hope the leg aches aren't too horrid today. Mine seem to be worst at night. The trick during the day seems to be move around a bit, but not too much. No marathons! And as you and Rosina said, distractions....
Do you have a date for your surgery yet? Sorry you might have said, I lose track. Brain is so muddly nowadays!!
Rosina, up and baking early this morning? Definitely a sign that you are back in the land of the living post T bashing go you! Send us a slice of that banana bread!!!
Actually, don't bother right now, my taste buds are all over the place! When I went to the outlet village with my son on Wednesday we visited the Lindt choc shop and treated ourselves to a few Lindt balls from the pic n mix there at huge expense. I have only eaten 2 of mine as they taste horrid all of a sudden!!! Usually they are heavenly. Stupid chemo still, I guess my waistline will benefit
(At least temporarily, I plan to eat them once they taste good again )
Enjoy art therapy. You know I am eternally jealous I really hope that we do all get to meet up face to face one day, it might be quite an emotional gathering!
Totally agree with your advice to Deano about the benefits of a jolly good cry. When I had my weepy day last week and went to see Rocketman, I honestly have never cried so hard at a film. But I am pretty sure I was crying much more for me than I was for Elton John! it helped it all come out though and I felt SO much better for it afterwards. Both psychologically and even physically. Less fatigued. My walk home from the cinema was so much easier than my walk there....
We women take on so much. I'm not as spiritually inclined as you, I must admit, with all the chakras and stuff. But I totally agree that what we all need to take out of this BC experience is the need for more self care.... I fully intend to be more selfish going forward, in the best possible way.
And I can't WAIT to get back into the pool! I miss swimming so so much.
Marlyn.... carry on screaming! That's the one. That was such a brilliant movie. I must have seen it a hundred times as a kid as it was always on and my dad seemed to love it. I blame Fenella Fielding
Sorry to hear the frazzling is still happening hope the new barrier gel helps.
The "almost done" thing is weird isn't it. I never know what to say. I know that our friends and family just care about us and want it all to be over and I feel like I am really bursting their bubbles when I launch in with "well, I still have a month of radiotherapy and then more surgery and then 3 years of acid infusions and 10 years of hormone treatment....". I guess they also want their "old" friend back who they can just have fun with and not feel obliged to pity.
I know everyone means well even if they do sometimes say things that unintentionally twang a nerve.
And that's why we are lucky we have each other in this forum group as we are the only ones who really get it!
Right.... I had better get up and dressed. Yet more roofers and builders and glaziers arriving any minute to give more quotes!
They don't want to see me in just a t shirt and pants, bra-less and lopsided
Love to all
Sonia my love, a day from hell indeed! Please let us know how the lung scan goes.....by eck...I often wonder how much more we can take, just when you think you've turned a corner another wee surprise is lurking!!
I wish friends would stop saying well done! I bet your glad your almost done.....almost done? I'll leave it there......I know you all understand how irritating this particular pearl of wisdom is...
i bloody love love you all....now off for some more rainbow beams......I xxxxxxx
lol.....frying tonight!! Carry on screaming....I'm afraid I'm a carry on uber fan! Got every single one in my DVD collection....I know...a bit sad but a carry on film got me through my first few days of each fec cycle...
as for the boob....no improvements, iv booked to have a telephone consultant with gp as chemist has advised a protective gel on prescription....knowing my luck they will call as I'm being beamed up!
well done to your son btw on the weight loss....he has done astoundingly well!
Oh and swimming ( up to 80 laps on some occasions) to deal with tension in back and shoulders.
As I said the body is cleverer than us !!
Taken me half a century to realise it !!!
Deano, when you need to cry , cry .
It needs to come out.
Don’t hold it in.
I have done a lot of holding in over the years.
It leads to blocking.
The body can’t be fooled.
It is so wise and clever.
In my reading a energy blockage at the 4th chakra manifests physically as any one ( or more ) of the following:
disorders of the heart, lungs, thymus, breasts, arms, shortness of breath, sunken chest, circulation problems, asthma, immune system deficiency, tension between shoulder blades, pain in chest.
I had years of tension between the shoulder blades and thought massage every 6 months was the solution.
Interestingly, about prior to my bc diagnosis I had decided that I was worth a monthly full body massage .
The 4th chakra deals with ‘self love ‘ and gentleness and compassion to yourself first.
If bc hadn’t happened to me I would not be reading any of this stuff. 🤪
distraction from the aches and pains of T is the best strategy. I used it too when even walking was too much - I used Netflix and read ( the reading took more effort but I persisted. On /Off sometimes I just dozed or daydreamed.) Support and good wishes from this group also helped me - a lot.
I have just finished making banana bread this morning as I am feeling even better ( 9 days post dose 5 of T).
So Edinbird, hope it is just WLE for you next ( a doddle compared to Chemotherapy).
Who else is in for last chemotherapy today ?
Sending you strength and peace of mind.
Seasidesar, you too have crossed that finish line. 🌼🌼🌼
I have got art Therapy later on today ( after a 2 week break).
It is becoming quite a profound experience for me , too much to type up here but happy to share in person with you when we meet up.
It is definitely influencing my reading:
Hi Edinbird & everyone else
imhabing my last T today and feel quite emotional about it. I saw surgeon wed and my lump had gone to 13mm (half inch) so have booked lumpectomy 10th July and then rads also having full mode clearance as had one swollen lymph node which has shrunk also. It was positive I go back to onc for results of lymph nodes to see if anymore had spread but she said lymph nodes if it had it’ll be whether I have rad on them as well as my breast so this will take me to sept time before I am fully gone - fingers crossed....I was told to take codeine twice a day for aches and pains and it is better than ibrupopen. Well feel I want to cry I’m gonna be a mess today off to get presents and card for staff - I’ve read up on everyone and know some treatments have stopped and I wish and send hugs to you all
I’m gonna ring that bell and launch it through the window today and hoping to video it if I can
❤️ You all and here’s to a **bleep** 2 weeks in T following today xx
Hi all xx
T is kicking my butt for the last time... crazy sore legs right now. Temperature was high overnight but no panic. Just feel very tired.
Boiler is currently turned off at the fuse to stop it whining and had no call back from the recommended plumber... will have to try him again later. Husband has just gone out to the doctors so I’ll probably wait til he’s back as I don’t fancy speaking to anyone when I’m feeling rough.
And the scans... well it’s good news but the sonographer was a really dour Indian lady who told me one thing but the numbers she gave me didn’t add up so with her ‘facts’ and demeanour it left me feeling pretty unsure.
The lymph nodes have responded really well. The lump has changed shape and isn’t getting bigger. And she thinks I’ll just need a WLE but up to the surgeon obviously. But she said the lump has shrunk and it’s 15mm and the consultant said after FEC it had shrunk and was 14mm??!! Hence my confusion and not really wanting to shout it from the rooftops. A good response in the nodes and a change of shape must show it’s dying off surely? I was just hoping for something more definitive and that added up.
Trying not to dwell on it. It’ll be cut out of me soon. Now have extra questions to ask of the surgeon though if one goal was to make the lump smaller to make less impact on me and that hasn’t worked what now? Especially with the rads shrinking things when you don’t have much to start with it is a concern.
Legs actually hurt less whilst I’m distracting myself writing. But I don’t want to keep putting my lump numbers through my brain and coming up with a mess. Only a few days wait until more answers on Tuesday. Lots of love everyone. First to finish full set of chemo but last to get the Barry out of me. At least I still have this set of T knocking the crap out of it as my legs can testify!
Seaside, well done on getting through the barrying chemo and all that cold capping. For you it was worth the pain and discomfort as you still have a lot of your lovely hair remaining. 🙌🏻 Xxx
Sonia, just had a quick look through yesterday’s posts. What a 💩day my darling. So much to cope with, so many tests. It does sound like they are being very thorough though and I suppose that’s a good thing. I hope the scan today will put your mind a rest. We are all with you every step of the way with our virtual arms around you. Xxx
Implausible The photo of your son made me gasp. What an amazing achievement for a lad his age. You must feel so proud that he had the strength of character to lose so much weight. He looks amazing, (even with the “oh god! I don’t want a photograph taken pose”). You are an amazing mum, sorting out the help he needed. Teenage years/school etc can be truly awful and thankfully he is coming out the other side now bless him. How you have coped with all this and bc my love and still kept your sense of humour I have no idea. I know we only see a part of you on here but you really are a wonderful, caring, beautiful soul who always has time for others and I am in total awe. (Bet I’ve made you blush now, sorry, but I needed to tell you that. Xxx
How’s your boiler/heating? Edinbird? Hopefully, it’s something that is easily sorted. In my house I find before we’ve had chance to get one thing sorted another crops up. Pants isn’t it?
My love to you all. Got to get on as early blood test. Yet another headache this morning (must be something to do with sleeping/lying down).
See you all later. Xxxx
Ooof. I've had a long and tiring day, and was going to come on here and whinge about it a bit, but honestly it has been a million times better than most of the rest of you have had to put up with today by the looks of things so I am suddenly counting my blessings, so no complaining from me!
Let me catch up with everyone....
Nettie, I hope the headache went away. I do hate headaches. You just can't think straight with a pounding head.
Rosina, sorry you've been feeling under the weather/fed up. I hope things are picking up now. The sculpture garden looks fantastic! There is one similar near me in the Cotswolds. It is a wonderful place to visit. I love your hubby's reaction to the art
Daisy it is good to hear from you. How are you holding up? I'm ok side effect wise so far, thanks for asking, if the last cycle is anything to go by, my legs will start aching tonight in bed and then by tomorrow I'll feel pretty rotten. At least it is the last time to go through this particular mill
Marlyn, the thought of rads taking all day is rather scary for me as I'm supposed to be working every afternoon Mon-Fri during my rads month to make up my hours for 3 full days equivalent.... Hopefully they won't give me too much work to do!
Sorry to hear that the boobie is still sore did you see any improvement from laying off the oily moisturiser? Hopefully you're not still "frying tonight"?? (which Carry On film was that from??)
And nobody warned me about boob shrinkage! I'm lopsided enough as it is without the biddy one getting any biddier!! This whole cancer treatment nonsense really is the gift that keeps on giving....
I hope tomorrow goes quicker for you, and then there is the blessed weekend reprieve.
Susie lovely flower photos, always appreciated! A gorgeous splash of colour like that always makes me smile.
You have certainly worn Dibley out today!!! I know just how he feels
And yes my son's weight loss was intentional and hard earned. It has taken him just under a year. He was very overweight before (23 stone!) , all put on quite quickly when he went through huge anxiety issues in the second half of secondary school. He has had some tough times. But last summer when he turned 16 he decided he was going to turn his life around, and boy has he! He joined the gym, I paid for personal trainer sessions for him to start with. He has also taken up jiu jitsu. And he has obviously improved his eating habits significantly (although he still isn't a saint , likes the occasional pizza ). He is down to 15.5 stone now and comfortably fits into a standard mens large. I think he would still like to lose another stone or two but he is near enough where he wants to be. I currently weigh more than him which I need to rectify ASAP given he is 3 inches taller and had giant feet!
In some of his new gear from yesterday. He still doesn't know how to pose for a photo
Seaside I had exactly the same experience with my last cold cap (before I gave it up completely). For the first time of use it made me feel sick and gave me a splitting head. I think it was because by then I was so bald so had no barrier from it. The last half hour waiting to be able to take it off seemed to last forever As soon as it came off though the nausea lifted, so hopefully it was the same for you? I was hoping that the theatre cap would get around that problem for you ....
But the main thing, is Ding! Ding! Ding! Well done for getting through your last sesh!!!
Sonia, what a day you have had!!! I'm glad that most of your many, many scans came back with good news but the shadow on the lung must be playing on your mind even though the medical pros seemed fairly relaxed about it. The last thing you need is more to worry about!!!
Really hope that that gets cleared up for you promptly tomorrow. You must be physically and mentally drained
Please do keep us in the loop tomorrow. We all care about you so very much x just think of it as suddenly having a much larger family, all these sisters you never knew you had!
Edinbird.... I know as I had a brief chat with you earlier offline that you have also had a knackering day! Please pop on when you can and let us know how your scans went x
And as for my day, as I said, suddenly it seems a lot better than most, and now I am all comfy tucked up in bed....but it was a bit of a slog as it was happening.
So for ages (since last autumn!) I've been trying to get my roof looked at, gutters replaced, and my jammed rear patio door replaced. I had the usual endless stream of tradesmen ignoring my calls and emails, or saying they would come round and quote but never turning up, etc. Then my diagnosis hit. Then I had all the bathrooms sorted. And so it was only this morning that I decided it was again time to try and get things moving.
Well I don't know why things are so different now to last October but I rang a few people and they all got straight back to me and all wanted to come round to quote this evening! So I had to spend the morning cleaning and tidying to "strange men in the house" levels .
Then I remembered I had booked a movie this afternoon and had left it a bit late so I walked into town at a far quicker pace than usual, with no breaks. Was exhausted by the time I got there and the escalators were out of order. Dragged myself up 3 big flights of stairs, nearly fainted with the effort, then noticed there was a lift I could have used! Doh!
Movie (X-Men Dark Phoenix) was a bit dull and I slept through about 30 minutes of it I hope I didn't snore!!
Then had to leg it home again to be there before the various builders started turning up. One was already outside my door waiting.
So I had to deal with them all till about 8pm.
But at least things are now moving again with project "fix poor neglected house"
I'm so tired now though I could sleep for a week!
Oh.... one bit of good news. My blood test results came back today and I am officially post menopausal! That's exactly what I was hoping to hear as a) it means I somehow slipped gracefully through the menopause without even noticing it, rather than turning into a screaming demon like my mum did through hers no hot flushes or other horrid symptoms. Hooray. And b) it means I now get letrazole not tamoxifen, and the side effects from tamoxifen sounded the worse of the two. So, I'm ok with that.
Ok I think it is now time to sleeeeeeep.
Love to all
Oh Sonia what a horrible day for you. Just want to give you a big hug. This is absolutely never ending hell! Hope tomorrow is better for you and you can get some answers.
Sar hope you have finished and are now at home. Well done on your last chemo x
Thinking of you all
Well I haven’t had the best day, I was in hospital for 11am and got out at 5pm,back tomorrow for 9am appointment, ecg good, ultra sound on leg no blood clots, think it’s just swelling affecting muscle, chest X-ray okay. Ct scan no blood clots but there is. A shadow, so wants to rule out lung cancer 😨 thinks it should be fine but mentioned it several times, also think it could be fluid coming from heart working overtime, so having a echo and another for of ct tomorrow morning all before my radiology scan in the afternoon. So my good week has been taken up by hospital everyday.
I’ve had my melt down, thinking how much more can I take, now hit my big girl pant on and taking it one step at a time!!
Sorry Sar, that your last chemo didn’t go to plan, mine seemed to go on for ever, hope your on your way home now .
love to you all xxx
He now says he is off to find some chicken wire, mirrors and wood to knock up some sculptures of his own and sell them at inflated prices
After another meltdown today,
H1 took me out to garden that I wanted to visit, the Hannah Peshar Sculpture Garden in Surrey :