Thats a sucker punch, we put our whole worlds into the surgeons and when you get news that they need to go in again....well...your world flips again! As for your job, play it by ear if you can, my friend was on oral chemo for breast cancer and she runs her own bar and b&b, she managed...she didn't loose hair, she just said she got pretty tired but she did it, I'm keeping everything crossed oral chemo will be nothing like what you've already had...
It will be interesting to see what your surgeon recommends. How do you feel about a mastectomy?
Its pretty sobering isnt it, I'm a complete control freak, I like schedules timetables and plans and I tick things off as I go, that way I get my head straight. I did it with surgery chemo rads meds....tick tick tick....to be told more needs to be done throws everything up in the air again...does that mean life goes on hold again? How will I feel? I really feel for you love, your support system here is enormous, I know it doesn't change anything but I hope you get positive emotional re enforcement from us....
Do what you got to do until wed, then you can write up another plan of action, get your head around it all put your practical hat on and get back in the ring...we're all in your corner....xxxxxx
Oh Edinbird. Big hug from me. That's what they found with mine as in DCIS around the original tumour which they were very surprised at which is why I had to have more surgery. Yes you will prob have the anc now but the scar is no worse than what you have already. When they didnt get clear margins the 2nd time round they said they had to recommend mastectomy but they had sort of got clear margins just not enough, i.e. 1mm so I decided that I would give it one more go as I didnt want to lose my breast for a 1mm. Its purely a personal choice though and your age may come into it more. We will be here to support you whenever it is so dont worry about being on your own going through chemo. We will be with you every step xxxx
I am sorry to hear you will be having more surgery it must feel like a never ending nightmare. I hope you get some clear answers on Wednesday as to the best way forward for you regarding the type of surgery you opt for. I suppose it will depend on how confident the surgeon is about getting it all the second time with clear margins because a third surgery if not would be hard to bare I think.
You also have the added stress of you job so I really feel for you and the stress you are feeling. Please take care and use this forum as a way of helping you think through what you are going to decide to do next.
Lots of love xxxxx
Quick update whilst I’m waiting to see the heart trial nurse...
Oncologist had the results. Not good. There was still a third of the lump cancerous and two of three nodes. Didn’t get clear margins and they found DCIS. So I’ll need another op will find out what on Weds, hopefully just in the same places but likely full clearance and fingers crossed just more from around where the lump was, but they could recommend a mastectomy. Depends on what surgery as to whether I need rads and then I’ll need six months of oral chemo. Wonderful.
Feeling a bit empty now - it’s not like this was all for nothing as the chemo has done a job but it’s the extra surgery that’s got me. I was half expecting the oral chemo. So I now will be the last of us on chemo albeit I know it’s not the same. No idea if I’ll be able to manage this job in Glasgow now 😞
Good Morning Girlies
Here are some photos of last night's friends and family Rock Choir end of term party. We raised £198 for our Breast Cancer Care charity that has brought us all together. It was a relaxed night so no full uniform as you can see by the shorts and yellow trousers. Everyone was complementary about my new hair style, infact one lady said oh you have had your hair cut - very funky she said. Until I explained that I had been wearing a wig!
I gave a little thank you to everyone for raising the money, told them about the charity and how it benefits women like me (us) and some facts and figures on BC, and indeed how your life is changed in an instance following diagnosis.
The cakes were fantastic and certainly NOT Slimming World friendly. So here are the photos, spot the deliberate mistake (not) with the signs at the back must be Welsh English 😄.
I’m sat in the hospital waiting room to see the oncologist... might get surgery results today if they’re back but they may not be. The surgeon gave me the chemo results so hopefully I’ll get the surgery results from the oncologist! If they’re not back I’ll at least speak to him about the sleep and sweats.
Popped into work first and then left a little later than I wanted to walk round and my legs didn’t object one bit! Yay maybe a couple of weeks of not moving about much did help! My legs and hips were definitely sore after my walk on Tuesday but that was a lot longer and further.
Great my appointment was at 10 it’s 10.10 and a woman who sat down next to me about a minute ago got called in straighten away to see my oncologist... might be here a while then...
Good luck for today Susie x
Nettie not sure about the hair colours, made me giggle though and the lashes are fab!
Ive just remembered that before starting hormones I should be given a DEXA scan to look for osteoporosis and also will have to have biphosphonates so I'm pleased I stopped GP from prescribing. Am still waiting for a phone call about it but am definitely not taking before I finish rads.
Rosina I will try to watch that podcast about hormones, I started listening to it but got distracted. I already knew about fat producing oestrogen which is why I want to lose weight.
Edinbird do you have an appt today for results? If so good luck.
Sarah good luck with your double rads session.
I started on my probiotics yesterday and nothing nasty has happened so far. In fact think some of the pains have already subsided.
Hope everyone else has a decent day. How are you Marlyn?
Speak later x
Well considering I took 8, yes 8! steroid tablets yesterday I slept pretty well last night🛌🏾😴😴😴. Thanks for the tips on taking 2nd dose early afternoon. Lot's of chat about disposal of needles. I pop mine in a chinese take-away plastic box, donated my my son, take it to my chemo unit when attending for treatment or PICC care who then put the needles in one of their special bins. No problems at all.
On the hair front, with you Nettienoo, can't wait to get my hair dyed again, but that's going to be ages away😭😭😭☹. May go pink first as a fingers up to bc. As for the summerhouse if you have room then go for it. We got one partly because the back of our house has a bay window in the middle and if we had a conservatory leading from our lounge it wouldn't look right.
Edinbird hope you're feeling better. Take it steady and if you don't feel well enough stay at home or go in but leave if necessary. That's an order!
Implausible, hope you have a better day with your rads. Who else is having rads today? Sorry losing track on who's doing what now. It was much easier when we were all on chemo.
Anyway must get up now. Got a few things to do then it's off to get on the chemo bus again at 12:30☹☹☹☹.
Have a good all of you. Shame about the weather⛈🌥🌦🌨🌩🌫☔.
This podcast is about hormones and breast cancer.
Just started listening and I am already learning 🤪
Pps those photos were so heavily filtered, I can hardly recognise myself but do love the fact there are eyelashes. 😂
Well girls on the sharps bin front, I did my very last wbc injection tonight another 🔔🔔🔔🔔🔔 moment (I think I’ve done 42 in total) and sealed the bin as best I could. I will offload when I have my next hospital appt. Not sure what dept though🤔. I can’t believe there has been so much trouble getting rid of them for some of you. I hope I don’t encounter similar or I will probably just dump it on a counter somewhere and make a run for it. I’m feeling much better this evening. The bone pain and headaches from the wbc will start in the next day or two but I know I can cope with them so just want them out of the way.
I can’t believe how much hair some of you have. Well done on persevering on the cold capping. I know it didn’t work for everyone but when it does it makes a huge difference to hair loss amounts.
I have a tiny bit of growth, a mix of dark, white and silver. I’ve given up with scarf/hat/ wig wearing in this warm weather. If I wear anything on my head at the moment, I feel hot and a bit faint within minutes so I’ve just had to be brave. I went for a hospital appt today and didn’t take anything to cover my head and actually forgot my head was bare most of the time. I got some looks and smiles but no outright staring. If anyone would have said in Feb that 5 months on I’d be happily trotting around in public bald, I would have laughed at the ridiculous notion. I really just don’t care anymore. I’m more self conscious about the eyelashes to be honest. Which reminds me, I’ve got a date for a LGFB course at long last. Mid Aug. I hope it will have been worth the wait.
My bestie showed me an app for trying different hairstyles on. I thought I should try and get used to the look of grey hair. We had a right giggle over it earlier. I’ll try and post a couple.
What do you reckon????
I think, I’ll stick with the brunette as soon as I can dye again. 😂😂😂.
Congratulations on reaching 6 weeks post chemo Seaside. 🙌🏻. Can you eat forbidden foods now?
Edinbird, work tomorrow? I hope it goes well love. Tell them they must all take special care of you or they will have Barry’s babes to answer to. 😊
I hope all the rads peeps are doing ok. It sounds so flipping exhausting but you all appear to be coping well so far.
Thinking of each and every one of you whether I’ve mentioned you or not. I do read every post. Loving the photos.
Rosina, I’ll keep everything crossed for good weather for you but I know you well enough now to know a bit of rain won’t stop you, Wonder Woman. Bye for now.
Take care everyone. Xxx
They do like making things difficult up where you are Daidydi 😳
I had filled my bin of sharps and then any extras that I could not stuff in just went into a Tesco bag. I gave the lot to the nurse at my last chemo session.
She took them , no problems with the bag , emptied it and returned the bag to me.
Maybe it’s because I have a different NHS up here that mine was simple! I was told I could take my sharps back to the chemo ward or to the gp surgery. GP surgery were happy to take it, once they’d put a sticker on it with my name and address on it! I was concerned I was going to receive it back in the post! And why they needed to know the origin of a sealed sharps bin I don’t know? It was sealed... anyway, they took it straight away. Maybe you need to send them to me and NHS Scotland will sort it!
Thanks Sonia and Sarah. I wish these people would realise that trying to get rid of a sharps bin when you are feeling very fragile is a big deal. Why does everything have to be such a battle. The receptionist said it wasnt sealed properly, it is a small one and I said my nails are too sore to do it after chemo. I said the hospital took my other one and just put it in their bigger one. Grrrrrrrrrrr!
Daisydi, I ended up wrapping my sharps bin up in a carrier bag and throwing it away with my normal rubbish in my wheelie bin!
GP wouldn't take it, pharmacy wouldn't take it, and nobody ever answered the phone number on the sticker on the bin that you were supposed to call for collection.
Figured it was all sealed up and I don't have any germs so it was probably not going to do too much harm. But still!
As for the aveeno, I do mine twice a day as instructed by the radiologist. Once when I get home from hospital about lunchtime. And then again just before bed.
Daisydi, I saw a trainee Dr last time I went to see the GP for my legs and broke down as he was lovely and ask how I really was doing.
I had a nightmare trying to get Aveeno from my Gp, I said the hospital told me I needed it, took several phone calls, they gave me a generic cream that is meant to be the same as aveeno but it’s not as thick, so I gave up and bought my own.
i cream when I get home, and again at bedtime I lay on the bed for a bit either then or later so the areas get some air time. Seems to be working so far . I had to take my sharps bin into the hospital as the Gp wouldn’t take it as it cost them !!
Hi Rosina, it was the GP that I went to. Couldn't even hand in my sharps bin. Seems like a third world country over this way. Cant be bothered with them any more.
6 weeks post chemo 🍀🍀🍀🍀
I have ordered 4 headscarves , which can be worn as a wide headband style as I get lots of compliments when I wear my headband from accessorise.
I asked my son which was the best look ( with or without a headband) and he said without a headband I look as if an experiment has blown up in my face 😂 but he was particular about the colour ( he only like the ‘rose gold ‘ one) . So I have gone ahead and bought block colours only.
Hopefully they will arrive tomorrow so that I can wear the ‘petrol green’ one on the hike. 🤗
my GP did the prescription for me. Not the Hospital radiographer or my oncologist.
The chemist did find it on their list of items that can be obtained by prescription.
I would go to your GP , fill in a repeat prescription form ( this is what I did) and then told the receptionist that it wasn’t a repeat prescription but a new one. Then I told her that I was due to start radiotherapy.
I left it at that and she said she would ask my GP on my behalf.
Anyway, it was approved.
Worth a try.
Update on my massage.
I was booked in at my regular salon ( where they use gorgeous Elemis products) but they were not happy about delivering a full body massage as I am still going through treatment as far as they are concerned.
So the lovely therapist gave me a hydrating facial and foot massage.
They also said that when cancer treatment ends they want a doctors letter stating that it’s ok for me to have massage treatments .
They were very apologetic about the misunderstanding but I am ok with what they offered me instead as it was very relaxing.
Implausible and Nettienoo, glad you both agree with me! Infact, after I had my weekly line flush I would sometimes go for a McDonalds afterwards and would tell the chemo nurses that was what I going to do! (I seemed to have a bit of a craving for them, not sure why because I rarely eat it normally) They always said if that's what you fancy, have it! They just seemed to be pleased I was eating and no-one said I don't think you should because of the possible weight gain.
As regards deodorant I had a little experiment going on because I was told not to use it on the side I was having rads-I think that side must have been affected because I didn't seem to sweat more or be smellier on the side I didn't use it! My rads onc told me I wasn't allowed to use it all last Summer even after I'd finished having radiotherapy. He told me I'd have other Summers to wear deodorant xx
Afternoon all, just an update on my progress today. Managed to see a GP who was an Honorary trainee whatever that might mean. Anyway he was very nice but didnt have answers to any of my questions and had to make various phone calls. He thinks my pain in abdo is chemo related and the rib pain is due to the fact that cartilage heals quicker than bone, or vice versa, cant remember and should start to settle down in a few more weeks. Ditto with the other abdo pain and checked whether I could start on probiotics which I can. Whilst looking at my records he found a letter from the oncologist saying that I should be prescribed Anastrazole after chemo so he's queried that but still waiting for an answer. I told him I would really like to get rads out of the way before taking on another load of potential side effects. Asked about the Watergel R1/R2 system and he couldn't find it on his prescription list so that was a no. Also told him I am being driven mad with itching and we decided I should start taking the antihistamines again so got him to presribe that at least. Ended up in floods of tears because he was being nice and caring towards me. My appointment lasted 45 minutes and I did keep apologising but just kept breaking down. Sarah I think if I had to go back twice in one day for rads I would be in tears so well done for just getting on with it. So now I have to decide whether to order the watergel system and pay for it myself or trust the Aveeno as Ive just bought loads of it. When you apply do you do it straight after zapping and then at night or do you wait until you get home? The disadvantage of the watergel system that I can see is that I have a large area to cover and the sachets might not be big enough and then I will have to buy another set. Oooh dont know what to do. Cant bear the thought of another load of blisters and sores to deal with.
On the sweaty armpit question I dont think I am sweating so much but saying that I am sweating everywhere else so who knows. Now do you apply your cream before or after deodorant or crystal rock in my case? Too many questions...
Hope everyone is ok x
PS loving the hair pics Sonia and Seaside. I had mine cut last week and it doesnt look too bad but it is still falling out but regrowing as well. Im sure there are natural colours you can use but cant remember what
Been quiet again as I felt rotten this morning - could not get off to sleep and was so wide awake that I didn’t want to take a sleeping tablet as they don’t seem to work unless I’m a bit drowsy to start with. So I was awake until the early hours and then when I got off it was only for a few hours and I woke up feeling sick! None of that nonsense during chemo! So I was then off and on from about 4.30 onwards, including going to the loo and changing beds! The stomach ache moved downwards after a while and then eventually I thought I’d better get up and all I’ve had is a cup of tea and a chocolate bar. Getting quite hungry now. Not exactly how I wanted to spend my last day before back to work!
On the sweaty stakes you know I’ve not been a dry person!! 🥵 my armpit on the good side has been a bit whiffy, all I can smell on the bad side is the dressings! I tried to pluck a few hairs out the other day as when I pulled the outer dressings off I had some quite long ones hiding underneath! My hair seems to be growing back everywhere except my eyelashes. My eyebrows look a little odd, it’s like the hair is dark and thick at the end and thinner and lighter at the root. But I don’t think I have any less of them still.
So I’m going to find something to eat now that doesn’t mess up my dinner and then wash my hair. I have to sleep tonight or I will be totally wiped out for work and oncologist appointment tomorrow.
Hope everyone is having a lovely day xx
Seaside Sar, looks like our posts overlapped.
love the hair, I had mine cut 2 weeks ago, I’m having a colour problem too, my hair dressers going to look into a natural colouring xx
I started writing this yesterday and found it on the lap top today, so I will continue
Susie, I could have written this as i feel exactly the same.
"As for the chat about dealing with and reacting to our diagnosis I sometimes wonder if I'm still in shock from the diagnosis and don't quite comprehend that all this treatment is actually happening to me. Weird or what?"
I feel like I am going through the motions but not digesting whats happening.
I love your elephant top. Oh the rosy cheeks I remember those well. Enjoy Dibley's stay.
Rosina, enjoy your massage, I have booked in for one next Wednesday as part of the BC centre.
MJB, I hope you enjoyed your coffee, it must be lovely to have your daughter home for the summer.xx
Trixielady, thanks for think of me today, hope you are keeping well.
Implausible, What a palaver. Hope the rest of your day has gone more smoothly. I asked this morning about when I would start the hormones, she didn't have a clue, so will ask my oncologist, and hopefully I will see him in the next 2 weeks at one of the med reviews. I am having Goserelin (zoladex) a pellet under the skin monthly, and Exemestane (Aromasin) in tablet form. The Dr did review my skin, which they didn't at the skin review just asked was I using cream and did I have any sore skin.
I will have to starve myself at this rate to loose weight i really want to loose weight before both of the operations.
Marilyn, no wonder your fatigued, at least your herceptin nurse is realistic, the dr I saw today said i should get tired. Really !!!
Re being braver. I never needed a wig, so can't relate 100% to that, but I take my boob (prosthetic) off daily, but wouldn't dream of answering the door or leaving the house, but I have started to answer the door now, and not one person has batted an eyelid. I kind of think this is me now, hopefully not forever, but for now.
Daisydi, I hope your not in pain today and the chest pains have decreased. xx
Nettinoo, I hope that temperature has stayed down xx
Rads went okay today, 6 down 9 to go, no redness yet, sightly stiff shoulder today, but think that's the way I slept, but will do extra exercises. weather is changing for the worse just as the kids break up tomorrow what joy. Hopefully the sun will come back or at least it stays dry to enjoying doing stuff outside.
Hope everyone else has had a good day. xx
Hello lovely ladies,
I am officially 6 weeks post chemo today so I celebrated by having my first haircut. The colour is a disaster so I will be wearing some headgear until I can even it out.
Just at the hospital having my Herceptin injection. Appointment was at 3pm and it's now 3.50pm....still waiting.
OK, 4.10 and it's done now. Not as painful as last time because they were so busy that by the time they got round to injecting me, it had come to room temperature. Yay.
Rads this morning was interesting. After my usual zapping I had to lie still for a further 10 minutes while they measured me up for the booster which will happen during the last week. They basically attached a metal device with several long rods to the normal machine. This then rested against my scar so it can deliver an intense boost to the area where the tumour was. They then had to trace the exact position of the device and take photographs. I got myself a nice physics lesson while they were doing all this.
Now for a catch up with you lot.
Nettie, I'm glad your temp came down. Must have been a worry. Hope you're feeling OK now.
Cor blimey, what a palaver with your rads today, Sarah. Much as it would have been amazing to see you in MK, I wouldn't have wished that journey on you. Glad it got sorted in the end.
Sonia, hope your zapping went well and your meds review. What was that in the end?
MBJ, hope you enjoyed your haircut. Nice to do something normal, isn't it?
Marlyn, werewolf hair...that made me chuckle! Hope the Herceptin went well for you today. Are you having injections too?
Rosina, you're a busy lady! Massage sounds good though. Good luck with the hike tomorrow.
Susie, hope you get some sleep tonight. Lovely pic of Dibley 😊
Trixielady, how are you feeling lovely? How many Herceptins have you had now?
Hope everyone else is OK today.
I'm continuing my 6 week post chemo celebrations with a Chinese takeaway tonight.
Love to all.
Rosina, growing blueberries in the ground? Guess you've got acid soil as they don't like clay. I'll have one geolous hubby if you have acid soil. On the underarm sweating I must admit I haven't noticed anything embarrassing with my post operation left arm which isn't getting the full deodorant treatment. May experiment but maybe not until my sister- in-laws visit on Sunday. Body massage sounds great. You deserve it. xx
Marlyn, what a lovely nurse full of so much positivity - not - .On the weight loss front it's fine to lose just a little at a time. Remember small steps. xxx
Firstly a huge THANK YOU for all your replies to yesterdays news. I think I'm fairly well stocked up on just about everything to either stave off or treat some of the possible side effects of CT, notably the T☹☹😵. Taken both lots of steroids for today so will wait and see how sleep pettern goes tonight. Also looking forward to red rosy cheeks which I'd forgotten about🤡.
MBJ, Marlyn I'll be having 4 rounds of CT at 3 weekly intervals, so long as my body behaves itself as it did with FEC🤞. As for the chemo bus is that the one that keeps going round and round the North Circular route? You never really know when you're going to reach your destination on each trip round🤔🤔. Good news on the boob front Marlyn. Scans are going to be the pits though, putting us through all that stress, etc beforehand and waiting for results, but they are there to help us. At least that's what I keep telling myself.
Edinbird thanks for the offer of support now that I finally have a definite diagnosis. I haven't read too much about triple neg, nor HER2 pos to be honest, as I couldn't see the point until I knew for sure which way things would go. Hope your sore arm gets better soon. As I mentioned before I gave up wearing a bra at night and I seem to be fine. Gone more tha a week now without growing a tennis ball🎾, just a bit swollen and lumpy.
Rosina, what on earth was wrong with your original quote that I can't repeat, especially after what Implausible got away with the other day😅😅😶😶.
Daisydi, Seaside Sar, Trixielady, sonia28, Implausible and Nettienoo, thanks for you comments and kind words. The nervous adrenaline rush did tire me in the end but I managed a good night's sleep so Billy bonus😴😴😴😴😴. The wine and pizza were yummy. Wonder when they'll next taste as good🤔🤔🤔? Glad your temp came back down Nettienoo. Guess I'll be back to checking mine from Saturday🌡. Hope today's zapping goes ok sonia.
MJB congrats on getting a haircut. Even though I only had a bit of a tidy up the other day it felt good to be doing something close to normal. Hate the new grey and white hair though🦍🦍🐨🐇🐇🐺🐱.
Implausible what a pain in the 🐎 It's supposed to be an a s s. Hope they soon get the rads machine working properly.
OK, this is what I found yesterday had to buy it.
That's enough of me waffling for now. I'll see if anyone's been writing while I've doing this post.
Take care Susie B xxxxx
Hi, no sweaty underarms on this end either.
I use a lemony solid deodorant bar under ( from Lush) the good armpit and the other side gets a rub on the top end of my arm ( not arm pit it’s still sensitive in there ) or I just spritz on my Clarins splash .
Picked up my R1/R2 system from the chemist today so ready for Monday.
Implausible your day sounds very frustrating.
I am going into school tomorrow morning. Then it’s up to Windsor tomorrow afternoon with my friend Liz ready for tomorrow’s hiking .
Booked in for a full body massage in a hour’s time because I feel that I deserve it.
I have heard the same about anastrazole (sp?) that it makes losing weight super difficult. I don't yet know if I'm going to be on that one or the other one (letrazole?), but from what I understand, they both make you tend towards "pudginess" in the same way that being on the pill used to until they brought in the mini pill....
I'm determined that I will try to lose the bulk of my recent gain before they put me on those hormone treatments, and then it will be a battle to maintain rather than an even harder battle to lose. That's the plan anyway! Fingers crossed.
I think I'm seeing my onc again 2 weeks after the end of rads, so I assume that's when he will want me to start the hormone meds, so that gives me - let's work this out - 3.5 weeks to lose 2 stone. Hmmmm. Might be a bit of a squeeze!!!
what a nuisance having to go back twice in one day, this happened to me on my last one....that will knacker you out!
My herceptin nurse said no wonder I'm fatigued....chemo will apparently take around 6 months to leave my system, then rads will linger...now she says herceptin makes you tired! Oh blimey...
on a positive note i have managed to loose 2 pound...ok...it's taken 3 weeks and I seem to be virtually starving myself but it's going in the right direction...on a parting note the nurse said....oh your on anastrozole aren't you..that will make you gain! She was certainly full of the joys today!
Looks like I might have made the trip to Oxford this morning for nothing, as their rads machine is broken and they are waiting for the engineer to turn up.
He won't be here for another half an hour and they don't know if he will be able to fix it in a timely manner, so they might end up sending me home and tagging another day on the end of my schedule. Which will be a pain in the butt! Never mind, these things happen...
At least it gives me some time to catch up with you lovely lot....
MBJ - great that your family are reunited now for the summer months. I don't even like the fact that my middle son lives up near Liverpool as that is so far away, let alone a different country/continent!
And yes, I've always believed the same as what you've been told at SW - weight loss happens in the kitchen, not at the gym. It's definitely more about the inward calories. But I really find that I need both....as the exercise keeps me honest with my food. If I've sweated away at the gym for an hour, I am damned if I'm going to negate all that hard work by having a doughnut!!
When I go back to the gym for good in November, I'm going to treat myself to 5 personal trainer sessions with the PT who specialises in post illness / treatment rehabilitation. I don't want to push myself too hard but I also don't want to not push myself hard enough. I can't wait to get back to a decent level of fitness.
Talking of sweating, here's an odd question (especially as I know a lot of you are having hot flushes). Is anyone else sweating less since chemo? I've discovered that I don't need to use deodorant any more. My armpits just don't seem to sweat or smell any more. It's very weird.
(Or maybe I do still stink but chemo has ruined my sense of smell )
Trixielady, yup still getting chauffeured to Oxford and back every day. I feel really bad for my lovely driver today. I told her I was going to be "in and out" as I have no other treatments today. But then of course I found out that the machine is broken! She is going to have a long wait
As for wig off moments (or in my case cap off moments as I haven't bothered with a wig).... I seem to have reached the "who cares" stage and I am braver about it now. But just a few weeks ago I was taking the bins out on bin night and someone I half know walked past and said hi, and looked at me a little oddly, then I realised I didn't have my hat on after they had walked on. I was mortified! Especially as I don't think they knew that I was going through cancer treatment. Oh well, they know now!
Oops re the car bump! Glad there was no damage! Good luck with your return to work interview. Must be quite daunting after such a long break. I had 14 months off about 12 years ago after being made redundant (through choice, I had a big payout and decided it would be nice to have some time off), and going back to work after that was a little scary at first. Although I soon settled back in, as will you I'm sure.
Rosina. Your "how is this happening to ME???" moment was very relatable! I never thought for a second that I would ever get breast cancer. No family history. And although a bit pudgy I've always been fairly fit. Never smoked, barely touched alcohol, veggie since I was 15, breast fed my kids. All the stuff they reckon will keep the beast at bay..... I always figured I would drop dead one day of a stroke like my mum did. She was in her 80s by then, mind. And my dad lived to 92, all my aunts and uncles lived well into their 80s or 90s. My great aunt lived to 108! I thought I had all the time in the world....
I remember after I told my kids about the diagnosis, my youngest (who is 17 today!) said "but mum it isn't FAIR, you are so nice to everyone, you don't deserve this " and my response was "too right!!! There are some right b*itches out there, and I'm a f*cking SAINT!!" - which I mainly said to make him laugh and lighten the situation (he rarely hears me swear!). But deep down I meant it! Why me???? Give it to someone who deserves it instead..... :/
I've got past that since. To be honest I now genuinely think I'm lucky (if the "cure" sticks, anyway). That thing up there about believing I had all the time in the world.... I don't think that any more. And that means instead of thinking "I'll do X or visit Y 'one day' ", I now think sod "one day", I'll do it next year! And my whole attitude to life has changed, for the better. I no longer "stress the small stuff". In fact when I hear someone getting wound up over something petty, I want to shake their shoulders and shout "it doesn't MATTER!!!". Life isn't about work, or money, or possessions, or whether or not Shirley from work nicked your tea mug. It's about making happy memories with the people you love, and travelling, and looking at beautiful art, and stopping to smell the flowers.....
I love this:
"You have been stony for too many years.
Try something different."
Thanks for sharing
Update... engineer has arrived..... fixed the machine in under a minute I'm up in about 10 minutes
Daisydi, hopefully if you get yourself a looser bra it should sort out those pains? Let us know how it goes....
MBJ, hooray for the digger! When my sons were younger they would have been so excited to see something like that in the garden they would have fainted with glee!
Hope you didn't get too cold overnight out there chained to it
Looking forward to see your garden transformation pics
Jencat 100 percent agree. I think the lady on the other post must have got her wires crossed.
Update 2 ....
Well, they fixed it. Ot thought they did.
Then they got half way through my treatment and it broke again!
They apparently can't leave me "half zapped" so now, if they can't fix it, I'm going to have to go to either Windsor or Milton Keynes to get the rest done! I might see Seaside Sar!!!
Susie - such great news that your scan was all clear!! And you now know where you stand with triple negative status and future treatment plans. No further surgery is a big bonus too We will all be cheering you through your next lot of chemo. Hope you enjoyed your celebratory shopping trip and pizza and booze
Update 3 ..... apparently the head radiologist says that the second half of my dose can wait till tomorrow morning. So I have to go to oxford, get the second half of today's zap, then come home, then go BACK to Oxford in the afternoon to get tomorrow's dose.
What a pain in the butt! Heading home now.
Where was I?
Rosina, I can't believe that the mods objected to "may the force...." etc. Perhaps they are more into Star Trek than Star Wars
Nettie just reading your post about your temp spike gave me trauma flashbacks! As you know I did the exact same thing (staying at home with a high temp when I probably should have gone to hospital!), and I did indeed get a big telling off from the onco nurse but after my previous horrid hospital experience I just couldn't bring myself to head back there! Glad your temp came down fairly swiftly, so you could relax again.
Sonia I hope your zapping today was a lot more successful than mine
MBJ how cool is it that you now have enough hair that it requires a trim!!
Marlyn - how spooky!!! I started typing this post at quarter past 9 this morning. Just checked again and you've posted about the lack of underarm sweat too
Am now home, shattered after all the palaver and late for work. Need to wake up before 8pm tonight as I'm off to the cinema for an anniversary showing of Jaws! 🦈
Love to all x
Hope your feeling much better this morning, its strange the day they stopped my chemo it happened to me but like you I'd give up stressing and just took someone paracetamol and rested think id had very few headaches over the last year until that point, good luck for the remainder of your chemo xx
mjb.....oh the neck hair! Only just this morning I have noticed how thick and curly mine is....it's gone nuts....just worried it will continue to grow downwards, I'll be like a wear wolf!
netti....well done in keeping yourself out of hospital love...a bit wiser now aren't we, although I still obsess over my thermometer....and blood pressure machine.....lol
saw surgeon yesterday, she had a good feel of both breasts ( relieved she didn't find owt) see her again in jan after my first mammogram......what a worry that will be!!!!
off to get me herceptin.....good luck to all those having rads today.....( incidentally....rads have destroyed my sweat glands under my right arm.....suppose it will save money on deodorant)
i love you all xxxxx
Good Morning Girlies
Yes experience is a wonderful thing Nettienoo thank goodness it was nothing serious.
Well I am sitting in the hairdresser's for the first time waiting to have my neck hair trimmed, don't need anything else trimmed that's for sure, but I have been to Slimming World now with my new hair and everyone said it looked lovely (well they would I suppose) but it's cooler and I have gone past caring to be honest. From here going to go for coffee with my daughter.
Have a good day girls xx
Nettinoo glad to hear you are feeling better.
Good Luck with the zapping Sonia28.
Susie, great news on the clear CT scan, I hope you enjoyed celebrating, we are al here for you during your chemo journey 💕
Im glad your temp came down, it just shows how we have al grown through this journey, but it must have been worrying for you, fingers crossed 🤞 that’s the last scare you have before you feel
your in the safe zone xx
will pop pop back later just going for today’s zapping session, with meds review with whatever that involves xx
Bit of an anxious evening yesterday. One week post final chemo and my temp suddenly started to shoot up and I had quite a bad headache. I had visions of the tedious journey to A&E for assessment and hours waiting to see if I was going to be admitted.
I decided to not panic but wait and see what happened for the next couple of hours before calling for advice. So happy I did because it eventually started to drop again and when it got to a less worrying level, I took paracetamol. It’s 36.2 this morning.
We’ve all come a long way since those early days of ringing straightaway. I’m seeing the Onco Nurse Specialist today and she will tell me off I’m sure. The way I look at it is, if I go to A&E unnecessarily, I am going to open myself to even more chance of infection. I reckon if I can get through the next 2 weeks without getting admitted I will finally be able to breathe again and will begin to feel that chemo is done and dusted. 🤒🙄 xx
Pleased your scan results are good, and best wishes for chemo onwards and upwards stay positive and keep fighting xx
Thanks for the update. So glad the CT scan was clear and that you now know what you're dealing with at least. Hope you enjoyed the wine and pizza. Now we're all gearing up with you for the next step. You can do it 💪
SusieB, thanks for update darling. Pizza and wine sounds like a perfect way to celebrate those CT scan results. I bet you were exhausted this evening with all that nervous Adrenalin rushing around your body all day. Barry’s babes are with you every step of the way. Xxxx
Glad you now know the full story Susie and no more surgery! That's a bonus. Good luck with your chemo x Hope you have had a good evening.
Very pleased for you Susieb.
Earlier on I said ‘May the Force Be with You’ ( without the quotation marks ‘ and the moderator didn’t like it 🤔
Hi Susie B
Great news about your scan results, and at least you know where you are now you have had the triple negative confirmed. I am sure you enjoyed the pizza and what you washed it down with. A nice treat well deserved before you get on the chemo bus again. Xx
Aw Susie I’m so glad they’re chucking everything at you then with chemo as it’s our weapon! 💣 You’re not on Facebook are you? I know I don’t always sell the groups and ours is definitely the best here 🙌🏻 But they can be helpful.
I’ve gotten used to it over the past six months but if there’s anything you want to ask here or by DM then please do xx
Had another lazy day, just heating my wheat bag in the microwave to ease my sore arm. I slept without a bra last night (as the non wired ones were in the other room and couldn’t be bothered to get one!) and it was absolutely fine. So I think I’ll try and stick to the non wired during the day or try and tighten the straps on the others! I’ve not been too sweaty today until just now, blame the wheat bag... I’m bound to get sweaty soon anyway...