Thank you for your support regarding my attending a funeral. It's all a bit overwhelming since diagnosis, which makes us face our humanity. I was ok for parts of it but some I did find distressing.
I am glad your port is working Implausible even if it is only one way.
Home relaxing now, high heels off thank goodness they were sooo uncomfortable.
So sad hopefully the weather stayed good, its terrible when people we know have lost loved ones comfort and loving words never seems enough xx big hugs
Implausible so pleased your sorted and chemo went ahead, fluids and rest haha don't forget
Daisydi and Rosina big hugs xx
Marlyn thinking about you, its not easy think we're both experiencing the same kind of things breathlessness loss of energy, I bathed but still not dressed just haven't got it in me to move, big hugs xx
Deano pleased your ok but so sorry about your friends dad, The goody bags good isn't from LGFG, its still hard not to worry about the outcome even though others are worse off xx big hugs
Edinbird its awful chemo brain and taking so long doing things at least your hubby can get a rest from you by going to the gym just like mine otherwise they'd be going mad by now x
Nettienoo big hugs don't want to say anything and tempt things love
Sandra, Veronica I'm pleased your reading the posts but we're here for you both and sometimes a few nice words is all it takes to brighten up someone else's day xx big hugs
Seaside sar thinking about you hopefully your keeping busy but resting enough to xx
Sonia28, SusieB . Ocean21 lots of love to you all minds blank now xx
Hi Susie B
yes I’m having chemo last one June 7th (not that I’m counting down or anything) then surgery and radiotherapy everyday for 3 wks I think I have to wait 6 wks i between each treatment I also have to have an mri to see what’s left in my boob not looking forward to it last time felt like I was on a building site with noise
Sorry I hadn’t been in touch my friends dad died and I decided not to do funeral as it’s too close to home although I’ve had good days something always manages to swipe me. On a good note I did look good feel good and it was brill got loads of make up and perfume top brands and shown how to do make up ( finally at last) so many women on my course were terminal - so I’m not gonna feel sorry for myself anymore. This treatment is rubbish but at least we get the choice and it’ll soon be over- role in summer ladies to regrowing hair and eyebrows lolxx
Flipping hec! Implausible you had me on tenterhooks there for a bit. So happy for you that port is ok. X
Good news. Bloods were good. And the x ray showed that the port line is still in the right place and it took the dye in ok (basically it has formed a valve so stuff can go in but blood can't get out!) so I am going ahead with chemo and don't need a cannula. Phew.
MBJ funeral will be difficult I am sure hope you are ok!
Great to hear from you Deano and that you're doing ok. Am I right in thinking you're having chemo followed by surgery, the same as me and Edinbird? Please keep in touch, even if you just give the occasional ❤, then we'll know you're ok. And we've missed you. Take care xxx
Glad you are ok Edinbird. Made me laugh you driving your husband up the wall. Best get out the way for a bit!
Sorry I’ve not been on yet I’ve been in proper steroids plus chemo brain mode today. Going round the house starting things then getting distracted and leaving a trail of half done... took me about an hour to make food which wasn’t just for me..! Trying to get my staffs claims for the weekend processed and it’s a new system and it’s all going wrong and technically I’m off sick but just trying to get it done... finally catching up with my bestie and then replying to a million things on Facebook... now I need to get something packaged up for the post office go to do that go to the pharmacy and ask what indigestion remedy is best to take with my heart pills and go to the shop even tho I can’t remember right now what I need to buy...
So bottom line I’m fine! 😂 need to go for the walk and calm down. I’m driving husband up the wall he’s working from home today in case I felt ill but I’m making him ill instead!
Morning lovely ladies,
MBJ, that's a tough thing for you to deal with today. Sending big hugs xx
Sarah, sounds like you're having a mare! What a pain. Hope it all gets sorted for you. Xx
Deano, lovely to hear from you. Glad you've been doing OK and keeping busy with horses, exciting! Any recommendations on Netflix? Xx
Marlyn, hang in there girl. It's a right horrible time but you're getting there xx
Beautiful pics again, Ocean. Keep them coming. Xx
Daisy, my veins are ruined as well. More noticeable when I'm doing my stretches. They look awful! Xx
Rosina, hope the bloods are good today. Thinking of you xx
Good luck at the hairdresser, Susie. Xx
Nettie, the comedown from steroids is not fun. Take it easy xx
Edinbird, hope you're feeling OK today and resting lots xx
Trixielady, how are you today lovely? Xx
Sandra and Veronica, thinking of you both and hoping things settle down for you xx
Everyone else, I hope the day is good to you. Thinking of you all. And don't forget, when all this is done, we are off to Barrybados for a knees up! 😎
I've had my blood test this morming. Now the long wait for the 6pm phone call...
Love you all.
I am off to my friend's husband's funeral he died of bowel cancer. I really hope I can cope with it. Feeling very vulnerable.
Oh Sarah what a pain in the barry! My veins are looking a bit iffy now. Im going to try to get mine done tomorrow when Im at hospital but it may be too soon for Tuesday. Good luck and a great big hug xxx
Oh implausible that really does suck! All you want is to get in...have your cocktail then home....I really hope they manage to sort you Hun.....let us know how you get on? Xxxxx
Deano, good to hear from you! Even if you don't feel like you have much to add (or can't drag yourself away from Game of Thrones for too long ) please do give us a quick update from time to time on how you are getting on, otherwise we worry!
As for me, I'm thoroughly fed up my lovely port that I always sang the praises of has failed me today. They have been trying to get blood out of it for an hour and a half and it hasn't given up a drop.
They have tried to get blood the old fashioned way too and after many attempts they managed one test tube out of my useless veins but they need two.
Now I have to go for an x ray to see what's up with the port. It is apparently possible that they can still use it for the chemo (if we can ever get enough blood out of me to even find out if I CAN have chemo today!!) as it is accepting a saline flush ok. If not, that means a cannula for today (they will have a LOT of fun trying to get one of those in me!!! Anaesthetists hate me!!! ) and more surgery to repair the port.
It's going to be a looooong day!
Good to hear from you deano, I too love Netflix and can easily waste an afternoon lost in some box set....
implasible...good luck Hun, hope you feel ok and are able to let us know how it went?
Im on day 5 now and the palpitations seem worse on cy4 ( or have I forgotten how bad they can be) feeling feeble and envious of all the lovely walks going on, just a trip to the bathroom tires me out!
Really have to go get a grip with this eating marlarkey, lost count of the pkts of crisps I had yesterday....feeling like jabber the hut....or the michelinman also seem to have that steroid moon face...
hopefully tomorrow will be a better day.....love you all xxxx
Hi All, Implausible, just to wish you a calm uneventful day at chemo.
Loads of hugs, Sandra
its Deano here and no your not paranoid I’m having T on Friday and having 8 steroids a day for 3 days and told you won’t sleep well for 3 days and to take nytol to help if this happens
sorry I’ve not been on I’ve been really god and busy with walking and riding my horse etc etc and watching game of thrones as usually tired in afternoon and have a Netflix box set addiction
I have been reading posts though and I had nothing to add - I’ll let you know how I get in withT though been told it only takes an hour so hopefully that’s better than 2.5 - 3 hrs with Fec
Anyone have painful veins from cannula my are aching and hard
take care everyone and good luck 3 down 3 to go and after Friday 6 wks left of Chemo - get in xx
Good luck with the chemotherapy today Implausible.
I don’t think steroids are necessarily to blame for mad thoughts.
As I was driving myself up this morning for my blood test I had to focus on my breathing as all manner of stupid stuff was running through my head from the car breaking down, to being late, delayed, no paperwork for my blood test ( don’t have any , will have to tell them) not wanting to even Barry bother with any of it .
I used my walking mantra: I am healthy and I am strong.
Waiting now for my turn.
Repeat : I am healthy and I am strong 😊 BREATH
Just read all the posts from yesterday and seen all the georgeous photos and artwork (Implausible). I'm going to my hairdresser later this morning but she really won't have much to do other than trim my thinning fringe so that it's not covering my eyes and maybe tidy the back a little.
On the bc note I'm HER2- positive/negative inconclusive. Hopefully they'll establish which I am when they operate and test a sample. At the moment I'm in limbo as I don't know if it'll be more chemo plus rads or chemo, rads and herceptin.
Be back later, must get up up or I'll be late🕥 for my appt.
Hope those of you having chemo today - sorry can't remember who- get on ok. Love you all❤❤❤❤
Morning all. Thanks for pics Ocean. Love flowers.
Edinbird how are you feeling?
Thinking of you today Sarah. Dont think the steroids make me paranoid but then I havenet had them on their own without any other drugs. Will see next week. I am seeing my oncologist tomorrow for the first time since treatment started. Will be interesting to see what he says.
Glad you are feeling better Nettie.
Hope everyone else is ok. Speak later xx
I am so pleased you are well enough to think about plants and organise the husband. If your photos are too big, mine always are you need to go into your photos click on the one you want to post then crop it a bit you find that in edit. Then come back on our site and you should be able to post the new smaller photo. X
I think I have found a new side effect of steroids to add to the list - raging paranoia!
They have upped me from 2 tablets at a time to 4 in preparation for T, and I think the double dose has toppled me over ....
Woke up in the night at around 3am all hot and sweaty.... par for the course.... but my brain was in paranoid overdrive. As I lay there trying to get back to sleep it assured me that none of my friends will ever be the same to me again, that they are only being nice to me at the moment for some kind of karmic reward (" be good to the person with the cancers and then you won't get it yourself"), and that people are talking about me behind my back and saying that I deserve it.
All bollocks of course, and I did manage to get back to sleep and have woken up back to sanity. And thankfully less sweaty
But rather unsettling! Anyone else get turned into a paranoid android by the drugs? It has to be the steroids as that was a very unusual thought pattern for me....
The gift that keeps on giving!!
Ocean - such beautiful photos again, thank you! Just what I needed to wake up to, truly.
Anyone else getting chemo'd today with me? I need to get up, take more paranoia pills and pack my bag. Was too tired to do it last night. Have to remember to pack paracetamol to take half an hour before the cold cap goes on. I forgot last time but luckily the lady in the next bed slipped me some
PS Rosina....mmmm....pear and stilton! One of the finest taste combos known to humankind!
love ‘lily if the valley ‘ and robins and roses.
I like to eat fresh figs straight off the tree and pear salad with walnuts and Stilton cheese 🤗
Hi lovelies, I’m awake early again but have had a bit more sleep so hopefully will be more in contact with the world today and less grumpy!
Implausible, you have such talent, I am so envious as I can’t even colour in neatly....well so my 10 yr old grandson told me recently lol.
Ocean, I have to mention the robin’s egg. I love robins so much, if I spot something like a mug with a robin on it, it has to come home with me. Please keep us updated with the nest goings on.
Sonia, it looks like you have had an amazing time at the caravan, lovely piccies.
Someone posted some beautiful sunset piccies too. Thank you. How glorious.
Trixielady, the next one will come soon enough, the delay with my last one because I was still unwell was definitely the right thing for me and will be for you too, I’m sure.
Edinbird, so happy to hear first T has been accomplished. Big hugs for you love.
I know there is a lot more I need to say to others but my mind has gone blank for now....
I managed to get back to the garden centre for some container plants for the garden. Got 3 but need more. Any tips for plants for pots that love a lot of shade girls. I’m a bit clueless but found the “shade loving plant area” and chose 3 I liked the look off. Felt, I had a good work out today, helping my husband Nick, lug bags of compost, big pots and plants into the car, then sorting at home and still found energy to go for a walk with husband and doggies when it had cooled down.
I’m feeling the comedown from steroids a bit now as feel a bit wobbly and headachy but I know from the last 2 cycles that I just need to “ride it through”.
I’m ER positive and will be on something long term after chemo but I’ve not been told what yet.
I’ve tried to post a phot of my new plants but it’s saying “file too big”. No idea why it’s just a big standard photo on my phone like all the others I’ve posted.🤔.
It looks like we should have at least one more day of good weather before the rain sets in. It’s been so lovely to get washing dried outside. It smells so amazing when I’m putting it way. The simple pleasures eh?
Love you all. Xxxx
How lovely to see al your photos, they give a real window into your worlds. Wonderful. Love the fact that they show we’re looking out into the world. I think that this bc business can make us all have moments where we just turn inwards because there’s so much stuff we’re trying to unravel and process .Through this bc journey finding that delicate balance between necessary inward reflections and connections to our outside worlds can be a bit of a challenge sometimes.
Edinbird , Taxol number one under your belt. Well done.
Trixielady, the postponement is no doubt a disappointment but next week will be upon us soon enough so like all the other lovelies have said take the opportunity to rest up.
Loved the talk about body hair and farting. My armpit hair disappeared pretty quickly as did my pubes. My nose can be like a dripping tap so the hairs there have gone. Same with inside my ears. I get blocked ears and when bending down I have to watch the angle of my head because coming back up I can have a real dizzy spell. Body generally very smooth.
No hair on head. Strangely, its felt like the few hairs I do have left have got a tiny bit longer. I’ve had some terrible sensitivity and numbness on the crown of my head so I’ve been massaging it daily in an effort to desensitise it. Normally, it just feels really smooth over most of my head and just a little rough over the bits where there are some hairs. Noticed these last couple of days my scalp has felt a bit prickly. My first Taxol treatment is scheduled for 30th so whether this new prickliness continues into growth it disappears is anyone’s guess.
On the farting front thankfully I haven’t experienced too many rocket launchers. I think taking a course of microbiotic tablets every three weeks or so helps get my gut microbes in balance. Had quite bad constipation after last chemo. Took matters in hand, coffee enema and microbiotics and things are flowing nicely!
Sweating. Goodness me ,where does it come from. At some point during the day I have rivers running off my head and I feel like I’m burning up all over. I rarely had a hot flush during menopause , seem to be making up for it now.
Garden pics for you. More stuff out that shouldn’t be.Going to have to give some serious thought as to what I can put in for interest later in the year if things re so ahead of time.
Right, rest well all of you.
Not a fraud at all Sandra! From what I remember you said that Veronica wasn't able to easily use the forum herself (although we would love to hear from her!) so you are her voice here and also you can carry our support back to her.
And you need support too
You are both going through a LOT!
both hormones that participate in the menstrual cycle.
Good night 🌙
I'm home safe and sound and hopefully having chemo this afternoon,
Sandraindurham & V so what happened did they reduce Veronica's chemo? How are you both feeling now??
Hi honey, Veronica could not do the 3rd, it had to be delayed for two weeks. She is afraid that chemo will not work, she is having a lot of nightmares about this, albeit her onco said that it is normal to have delays.
Her scar from the mastectomy isn't completely healed after more than 3 months, my poor baby. She has lots of night sweats and feels weak. She has lost all her hair in the 1st chemo, but she has been so courageous.
I am OK, I just started to feel a bit of a fraud coming here, you all are going through so much and I am just hurting by proxy.. and I am not in a good place, so I just come and read and then bugger off.
I hope you can do your chemo soon, but, please, take it easy.
I have survived! Well I’m on my way home anyway.
Took 4 goes to get the cannula in... new record 😂 then a good old faff with the cold cap given I’ve lost a lot of hair where they aim to preserve... bottom line I’m between sizes so I could end up proper Friar Tuck but I’ll live with my hats on.
No reaction to the drugs but got proper cold with the cap on which seemed weird when it’s so hot outside. Started feeling a bit iffy so had to have a sandwich for the journey as well as during the treatment but eating normally sorts me out.
So now to wait and see what happens... still not been given anything for diarrhoea and still can’t take ibuprofen so hoping any aches and pains are manageable.
Trixie how are you getting on? xx
Well done, young lady! now go on easy, ok?
Keep us posted.
Loads of xx
unfortunately i was unable to have mine today hopefully next weeks can go ahead after seeing my oncologist this Friday bit taken aback don't know why cause i already knew i wasn't well enough to have it.
Oh honey I am so sorry!
Look, Veronica had to delay it almost two weeks, you are going to be fine, we cannot joke around chemo, for you to do it you have to be strong, ok?
A big xx
Thank you Daisy but I dont think I have artistic genes at all. My drawings started off absolutely awful so instead I used to mainly collage or use rubber stamps.
They still aren't great - I see so many faults (don't look too closely at that blue car ) - but the more I practice the better it gets.
There are some people with God given natural talent. The rest of us just need to put the hours in
And even if the end result isn't brilliant I love the process regardless and can thoroughly recommend it
Sarah you are so very talented. I used to love Art, think I might try and get back into it again. Good luck for tomorrow x
Gosh I am miles behind with everyone.
Before I do a big catch up, Edinbird a big well done on getting through #4 and I am glad you didn't have a nasty reaction to the T. Very encouraging. Sorry about the cannula troubles though Do let me know how you get on tonight/ tomorrow as (hopefully) I'll be one day behind you
Trixielady sorry to hear they pushed you back. To be honest I was surprised they wanted you to go in so soon after being in hospital ill! Another week / few days to recover is probably just what you need BUT I know you must be gutted. I would be too.
Ok now back to where I left off....
Rosina, that article about the breast surgeon was so sad. All those years of training and she had to give up just as she got started Must admit I was very surprised by the first sentence about the fact she never checked her own boobies. You'd think she would be checking them every day with her knowledge of how common bc is and how they can do so much more for you if it is caught early. Just goes to show humans are utterly irrational! I bet Vulcans are more careful. Although I think by star trek time they had cured cancer completely anyway...
MBJ delighted to hear that you have some fresh hair growth on your bonce, even if you do need a magnifying glass that's so encouraging. My onco has twice now pointed out that in rare cases hair loss is permanent. I do wish he would stop saying that!!! I love my funky fake fringe but I dont want to still be wearing it in 3 years time!
Here is some encouragement, my pal, face blanked out for privacy, she finished chemo just over 4 years ago. Went totally bald v quickly, didn't cold cap. Her hair has grown back raally lovely. I first met her about 18 months after chemo and it was already at her shoulders.
Seaside Sar. You look the absolute picture of health and vitality on that bike! They could use you in an advert: the little jingle would go "See! Chemo ain't so bad!"
Glad the UK/Hungary game was fun. I'm not great with heat and sunshine, the rink sounds like a nice place to be at the moment did you learn any good Hungarian swear words? I used to work with a Hungarian lad, he was super nice, his middle initial was A and i asked him once what it stood for. He refused to tell me. Finally got it out of him under the influence of alcohol months later. It was actually Atilla. For real!
Ocean good to hear from you and well done for getting on with the gardening. I kind of did mine by proxy this weekend too, the 2 16 year olds asked me what I wanted for a birthday present so I handed them gardening gloves, trowels and weed killer and told them I expected the garden pristine by the time I got home from Birmingham. They did a not too bad job. I've told them how they can get even higher marks next time
Susie I'm glad you are feeling a little more comfortable about the surgery. I can't stress enough how much of a doddle my lumpectomy was (and my lump was 30mm). Lovely deep refreshing sleep after the general anaesthetic. Day and a half in hospital getting waited on hand and foot and then home with very little pain, all manageable with paracetamol and gentle exercises. And if your surgeon is anything like mine they will do a little nip tuck and lift while they are at it and you get a lovely pert boobie people pay good money for that!
Lymph nodes I know less about. They took 2 of my sentinel nodes out to biopsy. I thought they were clear as they had already done a scan and assured me all looked cancer free. But they did find a teeny tiny bit of the nasty stuff in one of the two. As they can't see anything on scans for the rest they have told me I don't need a full node clearance as if there are any more little breakaway cancer cells the chemo and radio should send them packing. I hope they are right!
And I am glad to read that side effect wise you are feeling so much better
Rosina again. Reading about the benefits of meditation for you, that's what painting does for me. Totally empties my brain (in a good way) and calms me down. I get really agitated if I can't do it for a few days. Same with swimming and the gym - although I'm having to live without those for now. I guess painting and exercise must be my yoga nidra!
Talking of painting I finally finished that page I have been working on off and on for everrrrr. So glad it is done!!! One page left of this 5 page story and I'm finished- thankfully as I want to do some different things for a bit, get the easel out and do some big canvasses I think.
Oh and love your photos. I haven't seen any bluebells yet this year. Must get on that.
Sonia - gorgeous seaside photos!!! Oh gosh I wish I lived closer to the sea!
Oh and I am ER plus and HER minus. Nobody has ever mentioned the third one to me.... PR?
I think that is me caught up. I'm just out for a little walk as I didn't leave the house yesterday!!! I worked on that comic page solid from 9am to 10pm do never got out of my jamas figured I had earned a lazy day after doing just under 30k steps over 2 days in Birmingham.
Just to prove all my local Swindon views aren't horrid, I am currently sat by the local duck pond and it is quite pretty. Lots of noisy teens here though (out of shot) so not as peaceful as usual
Only other amusing thing to note is call from my sister:
Sis: " I haven't got you a birthday present"
Me: (thinking , she hasn't for years so what's new!!!) "That's ok"
Sis: "do you wear perfume"
Me: "hardly ever"
Sis: "I'll get you some perfume"
Me: "well the chemo has messed my sense of smell up a bit"
Sis: " I've just Amazon Primed you some perfume"
Looks like I'm getting perfume! Whether I want it or not!
Love to all of you whether I've mentioned you or not. All of you are in my thoughts all the time. We are family.
Glad you've ticked another one off, Edinbird. Take it easy now.
Trixielady, I'm HER2+ ER+ PR+ and I'm due my first herceptin on Wednesday. Cycles 4, 5 & 6 will be given in the unit and after that I'll be given injections at home.
Sorry your chemo did not go ahead. Mind you I was surprised to read it was happening so soon after your discharge. Did they give you any idea why you were feeling so unwell, do they need to do anything to address it? Take the week to get yourself stronger for your next round. X
Well done Edinbird,
hope you get a good nights sleep 😴 keep us posted.
Trixielady, don’t be hard on yourself.
Glad you liked my photos.
There are lots of bluebells out there. I went out again this evening. They are everywhere around here.
No sign of the deer though, I spot birds or dog breeds instead 🤪 I also have songs mentally playing in my head . Here is one of them
Trixelady, sorry you couldn't go ahead today but the extra days will pay dividends xx I'm her2 pos and will start herceptin 3 weeks after final chemo, nurse told me I would have to stay in for 6 hours in case of a reaction....did you? How was it? Xxx
Trixie I think there are a few HER+ on this thread cos I was thinking of asking if anyone else was Oestrogen+ as there seems to be a lot of talk about Herceptin and I think that is only given to HER+. I am ER+ HER- I think!
Oh Rosina, bluebell Woods are absolutely amazing your photo brought back some wonderful childhood memories when we lived in Ashford Kent, there was a wonderful wood and the bluebells always made me so happy and seeing your photos actually made me forget how unhappy i was today after yet another chemo cancelled xx so thank you once again xx
Hi Ladies, hoping you've all had a lovely day? Edinbird so pleased you started T today don't forget to drink plenty and rest up , unfortunately i was unable to have mine today hopefully next weeks can go ahead after seeing my oncologist this Friday bit taken aback don't know why cause i already knew i wasn't well enough to have it.
Is anyone else HER2 positive ? I watched a film about Herceptin the injections for HER2 and the trouble getting it to market so pleased they did, its ok but not as informative as i thought it might have been still had me crying mainly because i was feeling happy for myself in a sorry kinda way as I'd started herceptin last Monday xx
So glad that the first T is over for you, hope you will feel ok in the next few days. Relax and rest now. X